Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – January 25, 2004
Drat It – Busted & Scuppered
Short Stories From 10 Years Ago – January 25, 2004 – I finished work today about 5:00 P.M – just in time to drive home and meet the guys who were delivering my new treadmill. I’ve had a couple of mix-ups with the fitness company where I bought the piece of equipment, that is going to help transform me into a hard-bodied babe.
Okay, okay – reality check I got a bit carried away there – but I’m back now. If I’m completely truthful, when the first two delivery attempts failed, I secretly thought “yippee”. I scrambled down off the proverbial “exercise” hook and coasted yet again. It wasn’t really necessary for me to refrain from exercise, as I have a pilates machine at home and numerous cardio and weight tapes.
But I rationalized that I wanted to start my new regime with the treadmill – (who I have named Howard) – as the commanding, central figure. I am the queen of rationalization and procrastination.
Howard – In All His Glory
Alas – the jig is up. Howard is now a fixture in my work-out room, so I am busted and scuppered. I’ve made up an exercise schedule, not elaborate and onerous but realistic, and I actually started it today. I must confess that I’ve undertaken this task umpteen times in the past, started with a grand flourish, only to crash and burn within two to three months.
This time it feels different and I’ve been trying to figure out why. I think it may have to do with recognizing at a core level that so much rides on my health. ‘Good Health’ is a complex blend of emotional, physical, mental and spiritual elements.
Over time I’ve kept these disparate components compartmentalized – trying to make each a success in its own right. At the start of this year I made a commitment to myself to endeavour to bring my life into harmony – internally and externally. Every part of my being has equal importance – together they make me a whole woman.
A lot is said in society these days about self-esteem, self-love and the importance of recognizing one’s strengths and improving the weaknesses that plague us. This year I have a calm focus on accepting who I am now. I have stopped struggling. I have surrendered. I’m letting life flow to me, and in so doing, I hope to address the areas in my life that need my care and attention.
What would life be without the blessing of good health? Somehow, when seen in this context – spending half an hour a day with Howard the Treadmill or my free weights seems like a small price to pay to have a strong body, to anchor an equally strong soul.
I’m grateful for this shift in perception – the coming of ‘wisdom’, soft and unexpected, is a gift. Being truly grateful is life changing and empowering. If you think it’s too late to change your life, I’m here to tell you that you can make a new choice in the blink of an eye. How truly miraculous is that?